Jealousy occurs in most human relationships at one time or another but we need to develop methods of coping with jealousy otherwise it will begin to eat us alive. Whether your relationship is an intimate one, a friendship, or just co-workers, it is not immune to the possibility of jealousy.
Jealousy can be thought of as those feelings you have when you perceive that your relationship is under attack. It can come about from your own insecurities about themselves and your relationships. This feeling is responsible for some very bad behavior exhibited by people who could not control their jealousy. From physical abuse to harsher abuse, the feeling has gotten many in serious trouble. How then can you start coping with jealousy?
Help on coping with jealousy
Research has shown that people learn about coping with jealousy in different ways either separately or in combination.j
Many people try to avoid the person they are jealous of. This can be a spouse, friend, or a family member.
With avoidance there is likely to be thoughts of leaving the relationship or simply to retreat to a ‘safe’ place or distance. This way of coping also includes staying away from the person and having little or no contact with them.
Another way people cope with jealousy is to revisit or reanalyze the situation. Here people will run through their minds what is happening, what caused it, and why it is affecting them in the way that it is.
People usually get upset and critical of themselves for being jealous and try to find reasons why they should not be jealous. We all have different ways of coping with jealousy.
They do this in an effort to reduce the intensity of the feeling.
There are those who cope by devaluing the relationship they have. They will pretend that the person is not “worth it” or is no longer an important person to them. This method really revolves around a self deception which is never a good thing to do.
Another common way people deal with jealousy is to communicate the feeling.
For many people this is not an easy thing to do. It has been found by researchers that communication can bring about a reduction in the feeling but only when it results in the relationship growing and becoming better or a change in the way the other person’s behavior is perceived.
By communicating the feeling in a constructive manner you will find that the other person usually understands your feelings and will often empathize with you and offer you some degree of comfort. They may even change their behavior so as to help you not feel jealous anymore.
One of the best methods of coping with jealousy is with hypnosis. You simply listen to the pre-recorded hypnosis session and gradually your jealousy will start to melt away.
Well i hav downloded z hypnosis track.. Hope that i stop feeling jealous.. I have a brother and he has his grlfriend.. I often feel jealous wenever they are together.. i love my brother more than my life.. I fear that he love his girlfriend more than me.
I just found out my brother’s girlfriend is pregnate and now he is spending much time with me or talking to me. We use to be really really close and now he hardly hugs me. His girlfriend is super nice but lately I’m feeling really upset and jealous. I love both of them and I hate feeling like this and I don’t want to talk to my Brother about it because he will think it’s stupid and I’ll get upset and embaressed about it.
I have been in a relationship with a same sex partner, and im not goin to lie I have been a jealous person since a remember, but lately I feel like everything makes me jealous where we work our friends even family members and now my mate has threaten that she’s moving out, i have no control over my jealousy and i hate it i avoid them as much as possible and its not the right thing to do, i just don’t want to be feeling like this anymore i’m tired and don’t know what i want to do sometimes?
Ever since i can remember, i have always been a pretty jealous person towards people. But it is not like a get jealous over stupid things though, i get pretty jealous at things in necessary situations. I don’t know why but people just really do not seem to like me at all these days. I do nothing wrong either, i am kind, fun, funny, and friendly to everyone i get in contact with. I hardly hurt anyone’s feelings and always listen to what people say especially when they are feeling down about a situation. But sometimes i think people really care less about me since i am constantly ignored. I am starting to think that perhaps i am envied or looked down upon because i am so nice, smart, and different from the rest. But why should i mold myself in becoming someone i am not…why should i dumb down myself, or pretend to be as mean and fake as them? I do not believe in really hurting others and like unity and harmony within a friendship/realtionship. But the more i keep living life and meeting people, the more i feel like nobody really understands or sees me as being anyone. I hate being different and rejected all the time and therefore i get extremely jealous at those who ignore me or give someone all the attention when they are no better than me. Do i sound selfish or i do i have the right to get jealous over things like these? I dislike constantly feeling hurt from the rejection and jealousy from my so called friends and family members and would just like to be accepted for who i am. Should i just ignore them and keep on being me or should i change my ways?
I’ve never been jealous in my life before, but now with my actual boyfriend i cant stop being jealous, i’ve been thinking about it. what is making me jealous? and i came to the conclusion that is not about him cheating on me, its about the time that he doesn’t spend with me, its killing me because when he is with me i enjoy him and he makes me so happy, but when he says that he has to go because he needs to spend time with his dad or friends i get so upset, i try not to show it, but its killing me inside, i don’t want to say anything because i don’t want him thinking that i’m trying to control his life. theres a story about a little kid who had a lil cat, he loved his cat so much that he hugged him until he suffocated him to death…i don’t want that to happen to us, i don’t my love to destroy our relationship. i really don’t know what to do.
Im jealous of my husband and his coworker because i know for myself that in his eyes his coworker
Is beautiful for him because she has all the characteristics he wants.. I have tried to open up wih him about
My jealousy problem but im still insecure darn..
I have a boyfriend with a wealthy family. I did not know this prior to dating him. He does not like to show his wealth. My family is in the low class , even our house is 100 yrs old and still has mice living with us. His house is 4 yrs old, everythng top of the line, porche , Lexus BMW, 10000 louis vuitton products everywhere. Yeah bling. My boyfriend is the best bf ive ever had and does not exploit his money. But sometimes his mom buys him expensive clothes, face products , gucci things, and even the down payment on his new car. His university tuition was paid for, his bedroom 3x siZe of mine. And he’s going on the 2nd cruise vacation this year. I have none of those. In fact I paid for my own new car that i bought last month, and university was paid for on my own (I still have student loans) and I pay for bills at home while I live at home for Internet. Tv. Electricity because we are poor and my parents aren’t the smartest. So I am so jealous of his brothers New Car (2010 golf gti) and their family vacations. They drop money like its nothing. I get so jealous!! He’s a great boyfriend though, mind you. He tries his best to help my situation bcos I’m in a lot of student loan debt and car debt. His mom is a stay at home mom for 23 years now. When his brother was choosing a car, he didn’t have to worry about the price or getting a the best deal bcos it was coming out from his dads pocket. I just bought my first car at 25 and don’t have to take the bus anymore finally. Like the article said, we can avoid them. So I hate going to Their house bcos everything I go there I feel hatred and jealously. Now the bf gets to go on 2nd cruise (oasis of the seas) vacation. While I stay here and work and study (I’m articling in accounting/finance) . We are both 25. I don’t know and I don’t want to be patient and earn these vacations and half million dollar houses. I just want them to appear in front of me like it does for my bf. I hate him but I love him. Domt know what to do but avoid him and his family right now.
i never used to be jealous. I had a 4 year relationship a few years back and never experienced jealousy. I am now in the best relationship of my life, but consequently I am destroying it with these jealous behaviors. I get jealous when my bf looks at his female roommate, i get jealous when he looks at women at the store, even when he goes out with his friends I feel jealous because I think he is going to look at more women or go to the strip club because his friends like to go. To top it off I caught him a week ago touching himself while watching a porn about girls of the month..and I’m having a hard time getting over it. i keep throwing it in his face and acting super hurt. The stupid thing is that him and I have watched porn together numerous times.We have the hottest sex EVER. For some reason when he does it without me though, I get super jealous. My jealousy is ruining our relationship. I need help!
I’m jealous. My boyfriend and I have been dating 5 months an now suddenly I’m jealous of his best friend that is a girl. I feel like he sees her As this perfect girl. She is skinny, funny, flirty, and looks alot like him. I dont want to be like this. He feels like I’m pushing him away from all his girl friends. I don’t mean to! I love this boi But I feel like I’m destroying our relationship. I couldnt even look at him without feeling ashamed…. Help me plz
well i have bin jealous ever sence i was cheated on. now im with a great guy but he gets often frustrated with me because i get jealous of every girl he meets online. for some reason its only the girls i havent met before. i have tryed everything i dont know what else to do
My father has a son by another women. He never really been in his life because the boys mother is a bitch. Recently my father has been spending time with the boy. I myself has spent time with him considering his my brother and all, but he is so freaking annoying and I honestly can’t stand being around him; I really don’t consider him has family. I am 21 years old and I know that it is very immature, but I don’t like him getting to know my father and spending time with him. Jealously has reared it’s ugly head, and I need help.
My dad gets jelous over me by getting my own money i wish he wouldnt. and i think he’s jelous cause he wants the money not me not sure why but thats how he is. wish he wasnt and just loved me. 🙁
My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half now. He is my everything. I love him more than words can explain… but I’m so jealous of him. Well not him but his family and wealth. His mother works over seas and she is only home for a few weeks a few times a year. I like her. I really do. She is an awesome woman. She is a single mom, she pulled her and her son up from nothing and brought them into the lap of luxury. By all means they deserve it. Now my boyfriend receives $400 a month from her just because. He got a brand new Titian for his first car as well as a boat. He doesn’t have a single thing to pay for. She takes care of the gas. They go on vacations all the time. He is going to Puerto Rico for his birthday this year. His family is very loving. I’m talking dinner together at the table, etc. Sometimes I wish his life would be more like mine. Vacations every two years, beat up crap car, working for what you have, and being told no. My parents and myself work our butts off and still struggle to keep on our feet. And then there are the times I wish I had what he had.. I mean who wouldn’t? I will admit. He is very thankful for what he has. That’s a good thing. I have to remind myself though.. he came from them same thing I’m from. Although our situations were different. I feel guilty for being jealous. Am I wrong for that?